Hi can someone plss help me checking my essay? I just wanted to know if it flows good and if Im giving a good explanation. (which I put 2 images of the question and the topic) (If there is something wrong or if I need to add please tell me!)

Hi can someone plss help me checking my essay I just wanted to know if it flows good and if Im giving a good explanation which I put 2 images of the question an class=
Hi can someone plss help me checking my essay I just wanted to know if it flows good and if Im giving a good explanation which I put 2 images of the question an class=
Hi can someone plss help me checking my essay I just wanted to know if it flows good and if Im giving a good explanation which I put 2 images of the question an class=

Respuesta :

This does flow well but at the end of your first paragraph, I would remove lets find out because I really don't think it offers much than just "fluff".

Flows very well just around the end of certain paragraphs there is some un-needed words
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