The introduction sentence isn’t very clear. But it should go something like this “The setting of the novel Fahrenheit 451 is set on a Utopian society in which Guy Montag lives”. The second sentence is pretty good and simple. The 3rd could use more description “Guy is a firefighter who is responsible for the burning of every book (What book? What does it talk about? Why does he have to burn it?) and also the houses of individuals who keep these books with them. Also put a ; on “...things are with his job; his neighbor...”
In the first paragraph I’d be best if the first 6 sentences belong to the first paragraph and the rest you use it for the 2nd paragraph and start with “Montag decides to quit his job with firm determination” As for the 2nd paragraph eliminate the transition “To start” and use something else. Also, it’s very nice just fix the grammatical errors like tv family and put “family TV” and something confuses me: Do people really ride jet cars on the streets? Or do they ride the jet cars on the skies? I think I’d be nice if you clarified this. Also, use more quotes in paragraph 2, it’s nice but you only used one to prove your veracity.
