Question

I need help please. I am attaching my document that I wrote. I need someone to help me with the instructions below.



Your finished document should contain the following:

Your topic sentence
At least two sentences explaining why your topic sentence is appropriate
At least two sentences explaining the purpose of your paragraph and how that affected your writing style
At least two sentences explaining how your writing would have changed if you had been writing to instruct someone (a coworker, friend, or acquaintance) on how to achieve the same success



My greatest success in my life would be my children. It was early in my life when I had them. They are my greatest success because they are the only thing I ever really done right in my whole life. I had three children that has grown up into wonderful adults. My oldest daughter is married and she has two little girls herself. My son owns his own business, and he has a daughter. My youngest daughter just turned 29. She hasn’t had children of her own yet, but she loves her nieces like they are her own. My kids do mean the world to me and I am so proud of what and who they have become. I did make the best decision when I had my them. The biggest obstacle that I had was when I was married, I suffered physical abuse from the father of my oldest two children. I think I was about 5 months pregnant with my son and my first baby was a little over a year old. My husband at the time started an argument with me that day; it was on a Sunday. We were on our way to my mom’s house to visit with her. He got so angry he stopped the car in the middle of the road and just started hitting me with his fist. He then looked at me and told me that I better be glad he didn’t hit me in the stomach. I had to stay calm enough to where I could get to a safe place and get some help. I ended up going to the doctor just to make sure the baby was ok, and that other than a broken bone and black eye that I was going to be ok too. After all this happened my dad told me that I needed to stay with him and think about the kids. When we went to court I decided that for them to be happy I had to be happy. I knew I would not be defeated by what had just happened to me. I was not going to be embarrassed by this happening to me because I am not the only one it has happened to. I am happily divorced now. I successfully went thru this obstacle to become the person I am today. It made me grow up a lot faster and made me understand that I had just more than myself that I have got to think about. I honestly think this obstacle helped with my growth and to bravely travel the harder roads that I had coming ahead of me. Everything that we had been thru and to see how successful my kids are is the reason I say they are my greatest success.

Answer 1

The topic sentence of the paragraph is “My greatest success in life would be my children.” It is an appropriate topic sentence because it describes what the main topic of the paragraph is. This paragraph is talking about how overcoming obstacles and giving the children the best chance of success has become the writers greatest success in life. The purpose of this paragraph is to inform readers of the writers personal successes as a mother. The writer has spoken about how she overcame the obstacle of getting out of an abusive home, raising her kids on her own, and watching these children grow and achieve their own success in life. The writing style is pretty casual and conversational which is perfect for the kind of success being outlined in the paragraph. If the writer were trying to instruct someone on how to achieve the same success as they did, the topic sentence would be different and so would the flow of the paragraph. There would be a more professional tone in the paragraph and if instructing the person on how to leave an abusive situation there would probably be a more serious tone. There would be a sense of urgency in the voice of the paragraph. The purpose would be to try to motivate and encourage the person you would be instructing to make the right choices for her and her children so she could later feel successful and happy.